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True Love for False Lyrics

We love this song, whatever it says



 

Poor Mr. Roth – something is missing from his Valentine’s Day DNA. He seems totally lacking in nostalgia for homemade Valentine’s boxes and homeroom parties, or affection for conversation hearts and frosted sugar cookies, red glitter and roses bought from the back of a kidnapper-style van at May and Britton.

I’ve spent the last several weeks lying in wait for Feb. 14, just to convince my husband that the only real flaw with Valentine’s Day is that it’s not a paid day off. Maybe all he needs to embrace the occasion is a properly worded love note – inspired, perhaps, by the words of a love song.

Over the past few weeks, I’ve embarked on a saccharine-drenched experiment: I’ve spent more time than any human should listening to Sirius/XM’s Love channel, the musical intersection of Maureen McGovern and Air Supply. Sure, I want to vomit cotton candy when I listen to it, but even the late, great Jim Croce had to say “I love you” in a song … plus, I’m committed to the cause.

Somewhere between “All Out of Love” and “My Heart Will Go On,” it occurred to me that, no matter the genre, I often have no idea what the song is actually saying, yet I stick to the mistaken lyrics I’ve created in my head. It turns out that there’s actually a name for misheard words and phrases: mondegreen.

The term comes from American author Sylvia Wright’s admission of a childhood mishearing of classic English poetry – it was years before she learned that “They hae slain the Earl Amurray and Lady Mondegreen” actually said “and laid him on the green,” not quite the romantic tragedy she had envisioned. Anyway, it’s always nice to put a name to something you’re doing wrong.

Ever singing from my own songbook, I’ve blithely endured my mondegreenery for years. I thought Queen was singing, “kicking your cat all over the place,” but it was only a can. It was breaking news to me that in “Come Monday,” Jimmy Buffett sings, “California has worn me quite thin. I just can’t wait to see you again.” My version was, “California is one big, white pan…” Maybe Cali is hot like a frying pan. A white one.

In the past 24 hours, I’ve also discovered that I’ve been singing the wrong words to “We Are Family” by Sister Sledge. The lyric goes, “Just let me state for the record, we’re givin’ love in a family dose” – not my version: “just let me speak for Rebecca.” I thought Rebecca must be one of the Sisters who wasn’t invited to the recording session, or she would have spoken for herself.

I dug a little deeper to find out what else I’d sung wrong. I love Thomas Dolby’s “She Blinded Me with Science.” He says, “good heavens, Miss Sakamoto, you’re beautiful!” I say, “good heavens, Miss South America, you’re beautiful!”

I never questioned the Starland Vocal Band when they sang (I thought) “rubbin’ sticks and stones together make a sparstic night.” What does sparstic even mean? Who cares? It really works there. (The real lyrics: “makes the sparks ignite.”)

Sting, it turns out, is wistful about the days he spent “among the fields of barley,” and slightly less so about my version, “among the fields of holly.” I’ve never really seen a field of holly, but he’s a Brit; maybe they have those in his part of England.

Why do Brits make English so hard to understand, anyway? I’ve had to re-lyric a lot of Elton John songs. I knew that “Bennie” from “Bennie and the Jets” had electric boots, not electric boobs, but I didn’t realize she had a mohair suit. I’d put her in a Mohawk suit, given the option. I’ve also crooned about counting the “head lice on the highway” in “Tiny Dancer.”

With Valentine’s Day hanging in the balance, I’m listening to songs more closely to find the right sentiment to win over Mr. Roth. It may come down to “just remember Isle of View, and it’ll be all right.”

 

 

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Calendar

September 2019

The Musical Swings is an interactive public art installation featuring 10 swings that each activate a different note, allowing participants to make music, connect to one another and have a...

Cost: Free

Where:
Bicentennial Park
201 North Walker Ave.
Oklahoma City, OK  73102
View map »


Sponsor: Oklahoma City Community Foundation
Telephone: 405-606-2922
Contact Name: Kasey Gardner
Website »

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Cost: $15

Where:
Oklahoma City Museum of Art
415 Couch Drive
Oklahoma City, OK  73102
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Telephone: 405.236.3100
Website »

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A Texas State of Mind, featuring the art of Larry G. Lemons of Nocona, TX, is coming to the Chisholm Trail Heritage Center in Duncan, OK.  A meet the artist reception will be 3:30 - 6:30...

Cost: $4-$6

Where:
Chisholm Trail Heritage Center
1000 Chisholm Trail Parkway
www.onthechisholmtrail.com
Duncan, OK  73533
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Sponsor: Chisholm Trail Heritage Center
Telephone: 580.252.6692
Contact Name: Toni Hopper
Website »

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Forms Through Language: an exhibition by San Francisco Artist Gyöngy Laky. On view September 12 – October 31. Free and open to the public. Join us for Laky's Artist Reception on...

Cost: Free

Where:
Artspace at Untitled
1 NE 3rd st
Oklahoma City, OK  73104
View map »


Telephone: 405-815-9995
Website »

More information

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Cost: Free

Where:
21C Hotel
900 W. Main St.
Oklahoma City, OK  73106
View map »


Telephone: 405-268-3978
Contact Name: Katie Barrick
Website »

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Bill Maher is an American comedian, Emmy nominated talk show host and political commentator who has been entertaining live audiences on the stage and on the television for three...

Cost: Varies

Where:
Civic Center Music Hall
201 N Walker Ave
Oklahoma City, OK  73102
View map »


Sponsor: OKC Broadway & DCF Concerts
Telephone: 405-594-8300
Website »

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Cost: $35 or $50. Prices do not include fees.

Where:
Civic Center Music Hall
201 N Walker Ave
Oklahoma City, OK  73102
View map »


Sponsor: Painted Sky Opera
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Cost: 40.00

Where:
Civic Center Music Hall
201 N Walker Ave
Oklahoma City, OK  73102
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Sponsor: Oklahoma City Rep
Telephone: 405-594-8300
Website »

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For the First time ever in Oklahoma City Pauleen & La Brasa present Bollywood Dance Night . Introducing Hindi Music @La Brasa Saturday 21st September. 10 PM 

Cost: $5

Where:
La Brasa
1310 NW 25th ST
Oklahoma , OK  73106
View map »


Sponsor: Pauleen
Contact Name: Pauleen

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La Brasa & Pauleen present Bollywood Night at La Brasa this Saturday, September 21st.  This is one of the first Hindi Music events to happen in Oklahoma City and anyone can come...

Cost: $5

Where:
La Brasa
1310 NW 25th St
Oklahoma City , OK  73105
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Telephone: 405-524-2251
Contact Name: Pauleen
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The Musical Swings is an interactive public art installation featuring 10 swings that each activate a different note, allowing participants to make music, connect to one another and have a...

Cost: Free

Where:
Bicentennial Park
201 North Walker Ave.
Oklahoma City, OK  73102
View map »


Sponsor: Oklahoma City Community Foundation
Telephone: 405-606-2922
Contact Name: Kasey Gardner
Website »

More information

Forms Through Language: an exhibition by San Francisco Artist Gyöngy Laky. On view September 12 – October 31. Free and open to the public. Join us for Laky's Artist Reception on...

Cost: Free

Where:
Artspace at Untitled
1 NE 3rd st
Oklahoma City, OK  73104
View map »


Telephone: 405-815-9995
Website »

More information

Show More...
Show Less...

The Musical Swings is an interactive public art installation featuring 10 swings that each activate a different note, allowing participants to make music, connect to one another and have a...

Cost: Free

Where:
Bicentennial Park
201 North Walker Ave.
Oklahoma City, OK  73102
View map »


Sponsor: Oklahoma City Community Foundation
Telephone: 405-606-2922
Contact Name: Kasey Gardner
Website »

More information

Forms Through Language: an exhibition by San Francisco Artist Gyöngy Laky. On view September 12 – October 31. Free and open to the public. Join us for Laky's Artist Reception on...

Cost: Free

Where:
Artspace at Untitled
1 NE 3rd st
Oklahoma City, OK  73104
View map »


Telephone: 405-815-9995
Website »

More information

Join us as we welcome poet, musician and Native American activist Lyla June as the keynote speaker of the eighth annual Ableson Religious Reconciliation Lecture on Sept. 24. Starting at 7 p.m. in...

Cost: Free

Where:
USAO Ballroom
1727 W. Alabama Ave.
Chickasha, OK  73018
View map »


Sponsor: University of Science and Arts of Oklahoma
Telephone: 405-574-1381
Contact Name: Zach Simpson
Website »

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Audiences across North America are toasting a new production of FIDDLER ON THE ROOF! Rich with musical hits you know and love, including "Tradition," "Sunrise, Sunset;'...

Cost: Varies

Where:
Civic Center Music Hall
201 N Walker Ave
Oklahoma City, OK  73102
View map »


Sponsor: OKC Broadway
Telephone: 405-594-8300
Website »

More information

Show More...
Show Less...

The Musical Swings is an interactive public art installation featuring 10 swings that each activate a different note, allowing participants to make music, connect to one another and have a...

Cost: Free

Where:
Bicentennial Park
201 North Walker Ave.
Oklahoma City, OK  73102
View map »


Sponsor: Oklahoma City Community Foundation
Telephone: 405-606-2922
Contact Name: Kasey Gardner
Website »

More information

Forms Through Language: an exhibition by San Francisco Artist Gyöngy Laky. On view September 12 – October 31. Free and open to the public. Join us for Laky's Artist Reception on...

Cost: Free

Where:
Artspace at Untitled
1 NE 3rd st
Oklahoma City, OK  73104
View map »


Telephone: 405-815-9995
Website »

More information

Audiences across North America are toasting a new production of FIDDLER ON THE ROOF! Rich with musical hits you know and love, including "Tradition," "Sunrise, Sunset;'...

Cost: Varies

Where:
Civic Center Music Hall
201 N Walker Ave
Oklahoma City, OK  73102
View map »


Sponsor: OKC Broadway
Telephone: 405-594-8300
Website »

More information

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Hudiburg Chevrolet Center
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The Musical Swings is an interactive public art installation featuring 10 swings that each activate a different note, allowing participants to make music, connect to one another and have a...

Cost: Free

Where:
Bicentennial Park
201 North Walker Ave.
Oklahoma City, OK  73102
View map »


Sponsor: Oklahoma City Community Foundation
Telephone: 405-606-2922
Contact Name: Kasey Gardner
Website »

More information

Forms Through Language: an exhibition by San Francisco Artist Gyöngy Laky. On view September 12 – October 31. Free and open to the public. Join us for Laky's Artist Reception on...

Cost: Free

Where:
Artspace at Untitled
1 NE 3rd st
Oklahoma City, OK  73104
View map »


Telephone: 405-815-9995
Website »

More information

Professional instruction in the art of improvisation. Though some experience with improvisation is beneficial, all skill levels are welcome, no prerequisite classes.  Though sketch comedy...

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The Paramount Room
701 W. Sheridan Ave
Oklahoma City, OK  73102
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Sponsor: The Space OKC
Telephone: 405-887-3327
Contact Name: AL Caveny
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Audiences across North America are toasting a new production of FIDDLER ON THE ROOF! Rich with musical hits you know and love, including "Tradition," "Sunrise, Sunset;'...

Cost: Varies

Where:
Civic Center Music Hall
201 N Walker Ave
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The Musical Swings is an interactive public art installation featuring 10 swings that each activate a different note, allowing participants to make music, connect to one another and have a...

Cost: Free

Where:
Bicentennial Park
201 North Walker Ave.
Oklahoma City, OK  73102
View map »


Sponsor: Oklahoma City Community Foundation
Telephone: 405-606-2922
Contact Name: Kasey Gardner
Website »

More information

Forms Through Language: an exhibition by San Francisco Artist Gyöngy Laky. On view September 12 – October 31. Free and open to the public. Join us for Laky's Artist Reception on...

Cost: Free

Where:
Artspace at Untitled
1 NE 3rd st
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Telephone: 405-815-9995
Website »

More information

The evening Cocktail Cruise offers stunning views of the downtown skyline, the Boathouse District & Finish Line Tower, the Wheeler Ferris wheel and, quite possibly, an amazing...

Cost: Adult: $20 Seniors and Children: $15

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701 S. Lincoln Blvd
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Sponsor: Oklahoma River Cruises
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Contact Name: Che Loessberg
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Professional instruction in the art of improvisation. Though some experience with improvisation is beneficial, all skill levels are welcome, no prerequisite classes.  Though sketch comedy...

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The Paramount Room
701 W. Sheridan Ave
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Sponsor: The Space OKC
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Contact Name: AL Caveny
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Audiences across North America are toasting a new production of FIDDLER ON THE ROOF! Rich with musical hits you know and love, including "Tradition," "Sunrise, Sunset;'...

Cost: Varies

Where:
Civic Center Music Hall
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Telephone: 405-594-8300
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Cost: $35 or $50. Prices do not include fees.

Where:
Civic Center Music Hall
201 N Walker Ave
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View map »


Sponsor: Painted Sky Opera
Telephone: 405-594-8300
Website »

More information

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Join us for the St. Jude Walk/Run during Childhood Cancer Awareness Month in September, to raise money for the kids of St. Jude, where families never receive a bill for anything. Let's end...

Cost: $10 Registration Fee

Where:
Myriad Botanical Gardens
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Sponsor: St. Jude Children's Research Hospital
Telephone: 405-815-5705
Contact Name: Emily Drover
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DAY OUT WITH THOMAS™: THE STEAM TEAM TOUR 2019 IS PULLING INTO OKLAHOMA RAILWAY MUSEUM FOR THOMAS & FRIENDS’ BIGGEST YEAR YET! ENJOY A DAY OF FAMILY FUN WITH THOMAS THE TANK...

Cost: $18

Where:
Oklahoma Railway Museum
3400 NE Grand Blvd
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View map »


Contact Name: Danielle Fusaro
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More information

The Musical Swings is an interactive public art installation featuring 10 swings that each activate a different note, allowing participants to make music, connect to one another and have a...

Cost: Free

Where:
Bicentennial Park
201 North Walker Ave.
Oklahoma City, OK  73102
View map »


Sponsor: Oklahoma City Community Foundation
Telephone: 405-606-2922
Contact Name: Kasey Gardner
Website »

More information

Forms Through Language: an exhibition by San Francisco Artist Gyöngy Laky. On view September 12 – October 31. Free and open to the public. Join us for Laky's Artist Reception on...

Cost: Free

Where:
Artspace at Untitled
1 NE 3rd st
Oklahoma City, OK  73104
View map »


Telephone: 405-815-9995
Website »

More information

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Cost: $59.95

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Sponsor: The Dinner Detective
Telephone: 866.496.0535
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We're poppin' champagne on the patio this Saturday and raffling off a bottle of Perrier-Jouet valued at $300! Come pre-party with us and DJ Catherine Ouellette from 6pm-10pm -...

Cost: Free

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1, N Broadway Ave
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The evening Cocktail Cruise offers stunning views of the downtown skyline, the Boathouse District & Finish Line Tower, the Wheeler Ferris wheel and, quite possibly, an amazing...

Cost: Adult: $20 Seniors and Children: $15

Where:
Regatta Park Landing
701 S. Lincoln Blvd
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View map »


Sponsor: Oklahoma River Cruises
Telephone: 405-702-7755
Contact Name: Che Loessberg
Website »

More information

Professional instruction in the art of improvisation. Though some experience with improvisation is beneficial, all skill levels are welcome, no prerequisite classes.  Though sketch comedy...

Cost: $175 for the full term

Where:
The Paramount Room
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View map »


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Telephone: 405-887-3327
Contact Name: AL Caveny
Website »

More information

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The Auditorium at The Douglass
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OKC, OK  73117
View map »


Sponsor: The Blue Door & Kessler Presentss
Telephone: 405-652-9541
Contact Name: Melissa Monroe
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Audiences across North America are toasting a new production of FIDDLER ON THE ROOF! Rich with musical hits you know and love, including "Tradition," "Sunrise, Sunset;'...

Cost: Varies

Where:
Civic Center Music Hall
201 N Walker Ave
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View map »


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Telephone: 405-594-8300
Website »

More information

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