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Addiction Calling

Are you attached to your phone?



 



I’ve just come across the 30-Day Phone Breakup Challenge, an ambitious exercise designed to help the phone-addicted rein in their unbridled devotion to their electronic appendage, the black hole of omnipotent black holes.
 

I’m evaluating my level of phone addiction to determine whether or not to take the challenge, which culminates in a 24-hour period of abstinence.

The very thought of it gives me a little separation anxiety, something I experienced the day I left my phone behind on my way to a doctor’s appointment. I didn’t realize I’d left it until I emptied my purse in the waiting room. Panic set in, followed quickly by dread. Fidgeting like a spider monkey in a botched medical experiment, I scoffed silently to the universe. What am I supposed to do now? Read that 10-month-old Highlights magazine? And then what?

My bad luck was only starting; the doctor was running a solid hour behind schedule. Ordinarily, I might shrug it off as a mild inconvenience and entertain myself with a Bejeweled marathon on my phone. Without my phone, however, time stood still. If my hair had been on fire, no one else in the waiting room would have noticed; they were too enthralled by their phones.

After finishing my third back issue of Highlights, I became increasingly indignant about the doctor’s delay. I was bored out of my skull. I can’t believe he’s making me watch daytime TV out here! That’s it – I’m calling that front desk and giving them a piece of my mind. (reaches for phone) … Dammit!

Despite the predictable “oh my god, where’s my phone” adrenalin surge I get when I don’t instantly feel it in my purse (the other black hole), I still consider myself to be a fairly mild sufferer of phone-itis. Do I really need a detox program?

Sure, if the house were on fire, it’s the one material thing I’d save on my way out (gotta call 911, don’tcha know). If my phone went up in flames, I’d be losing my GPS, my remote office, my camera, my flashlight, my photo album, my bank, my alarm clock and my weather report. I think I’m a casual user in comparison to the rest of humanity, but how do you really measure that?


If there were a sliding scale of phone addiction, it would probably go like this:
 


If …

… you are a member of a lost tribe of humans, recently discovered in a Honduran jungle with no electricity or cell coverage, score 0 points.

… you are an infant less than six months of age, score 1 point – for now.     (Increase by two points for each year of life hereafter.)

… you are my mom, whose purse rings with abandon, and who forgets she even owns a phone, score 2 points.

… you own a burner phone (or a Jitterbug) like my mom’s and you can still hear it ringing, score 3 points.
 

If …

… you have a cell phone that you carry only for emergencies, score 4 points.

… you have a cell phone that you carry and use daily, score 5 points.

… you have a cell phone instead of a land line, score 6 points.
 


If …  
 
… you use your cell phone to rehash every detail of your sordid work conflict or personal breakup at full volume in public, score 7 points (and know that I find your drama extremely entertaining, in a “Honey Boo Boo” / can’t help watching kind of way).

… your phone is always in your hand, even in the bathroom, or you sleep with your phone next to your head, score 8 points (alert: you may need more therapy than just a phone detox).

… you have more eye contact with your phone in a week than you’ve had with your children during the last three years, score 9 points (then go hire a wolf to raise your kids).
 

If …

… you were born after 1990, score 10 points. You can’t help it.

… you occupy space in a room with fellow human beings who are communicating through the spoken word, yet you continue to text god-knows-who as if you’re alone in the bathroom, score 10 points.

… you must text and drive, score 1 million points and take the first exit – to a remote Honduran jungle.

 

 

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Calendar

September 2019

Start your Sunday morning by perfecting your practice during our outdoor yoga class. Enjoy the beauty of yoga outdoors in the glow of the Ferris Wheel lights! This class welcomes all levels, from...

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Wheeler Ferris Wheel
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Oklahoma City Museum of Art
415 Couch Drive
Oklahoma City, OK  73102
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Cost: $4-$6

Where:
Chisholm Trail Heritage Center
1000 Chisholm Trail Parkway
www.onthechisholmtrail.com
Duncan, OK  73533
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Sponsor: Chisholm Trail Heritage Center
Telephone: 580.252.6692
Contact Name: Toni Hopper
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Cost: Free

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Telephone: 405-815-9995
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Artspace at Untitled
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Cost: $4-$6

Where:
Chisholm Trail Heritage Center
1000 Chisholm Trail Parkway
www.onthechisholmtrail.com
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View map »


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Telephone: 580.252.6692
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A Texas State of Mind, featuring the art of Larry G. Lemons of Nocona, TX, is coming to the Chisholm Trail Heritage Center in Duncan, OK.  A meet the artist reception will be 3:30 - 6:30...

Cost: $4-$6

Where:
Chisholm Trail Heritage Center
1000 Chisholm Trail Parkway
www.onthechisholmtrail.com
Duncan, OK  73533
View map »


Sponsor: Chisholm Trail Heritage Center
Telephone: 580.252.6692
Contact Name: Toni Hopper
Website »

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Forms Through Language: an exhibition by San Francisco Artist Gyöngy Laky. On view September 12 – October 31. Free and open to the public. Join us for Laky's Artist Reception on...

Cost: Free

Where:
Artspace at Untitled
1 NE 3rd st
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View map »


Telephone: 405-815-9995
Website »

More information

Featuring more than 70 works by French and European masters such as Degas, Manet, Monet, Rousseau and Van Gogh, this exhibition celebrates Mr. and Mrs. Paul Mellon’s extraordinary gift of...

Cost: $15

Where:
Oklahoma City Museum of Art
415 Couch Drive
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View map »


Telephone: 405.236.3100
Website »

More information

Show More...
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A Texas State of Mind, featuring the art of Larry G. Lemons of Nocona, TX, is coming to the Chisholm Trail Heritage Center in Duncan, OK.  A meet the artist reception will be 3:30 - 6:30...

Cost: $4-$6

Where:
Chisholm Trail Heritage Center
1000 Chisholm Trail Parkway
www.onthechisholmtrail.com
Duncan, OK  73533
View map »


Sponsor: Chisholm Trail Heritage Center
Telephone: 580.252.6692
Contact Name: Toni Hopper
Website »

More information

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Cost: $15

Where:
Oklahoma City Museum of Art
415 Couch Drive
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View map »


Telephone: 405.236.3100
Website »

More information

Forms Through Language: an exhibition by San Francisco Artist Gyöngy Laky. On view September 12 – October 31. Free and open to the public. Join us for Laky's Artist Reception on...

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Artspace at Untitled
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Telephone: 405-815-9995
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Cost: $15

Where:
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View map »


Telephone: 405.236.3100
Website »

More information

Forms Through Language: an exhibition by San Francisco Artist Gyöngy Laky. On view September 12 – October 31. Free and open to the public. Join us for Laky's Artist Reception on...

Cost: Free

Where:
Artspace at Untitled
1 NE 3rd st
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View map »


Telephone: 405-815-9995
Website »

More information

A Texas State of Mind, featuring the art of Larry G. Lemons of Nocona, TX, is coming to the Chisholm Trail Heritage Center in Duncan, OK.  A meet the artist reception will be 3:30 - 6:30...

Cost: $4-$6

Where:
Chisholm Trail Heritage Center
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www.onthechisholmtrail.com
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View map »


Sponsor: Chisholm Trail Heritage Center
Telephone: 580.252.6692
Contact Name: Toni Hopper
Website »

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Cost: $15

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415 Couch Drive
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Telephone: 405.236.3100
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Cost: Free

Where:
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1 NE 3rd st
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View map »


Telephone: 405-815-9995
Website »

More information

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Cost: $4-$6

Where:
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www.onthechisholmtrail.com
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View map »


Sponsor: Chisholm Trail Heritage Center
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Contact Name: Toni Hopper
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Contact Name: Che Loessberg
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Cost: 40.00

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View map »


Sponsor: Oklahoma City Rep
Telephone: 405-594-8300
Website »

More information

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Website »

More information

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Cost: Free

Where:
Bicentennial Park
201 North Walker Ave.
Oklahoma City, OK  73102
View map »


Sponsor: Oklahoma City Community Foundation
Telephone: 405-606-2922
Contact Name: Kasey Gardner
Website »

More information

Forms Through Language: an exhibition by San Francisco Artist Gyöngy Laky. On view September 12 – October 31. Free and open to the public. Join us for Laky's Artist Reception on...

Cost: Free

Where:
Artspace at Untitled
1 NE 3rd st
Oklahoma City, OK  73104
View map »


Telephone: 405-815-9995
Website »

More information

Featuring more than 70 works by French and European masters such as Degas, Manet, Monet, Rousseau and Van Gogh, this exhibition celebrates Mr. and Mrs. Paul Mellon’s extraordinary gift of...

Cost: $15

Where:
Oklahoma City Museum of Art
415 Couch Drive
Oklahoma City, OK  73102
View map »


Telephone: 405.236.3100
Website »

More information

A Texas State of Mind, featuring the art of Larry G. Lemons of Nocona, TX, is coming to the Chisholm Trail Heritage Center in Duncan, OK.  A meet the artist reception will be 3:30 - 6:30...

Cost: $4-$6

Where:
Chisholm Trail Heritage Center
1000 Chisholm Trail Parkway
www.onthechisholmtrail.com
Duncan, OK  73533
View map »


Sponsor: Chisholm Trail Heritage Center
Telephone: 580.252.6692
Contact Name: Toni Hopper
Website »

More information

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More information

Produced and Organized, Gwinner Studios Ltd. Co. presents an all-Oklahoma, all-Original Music festival located in Bricktown. This is a free event for the community, featuring Oklahoma-original...

Cost: free

Where:
Bricktown
Oklahoma City, OK


Sponsor: Gwinner Studios Ltd. Co.
Telephone: 405-740-9618
Contact Name: Jessica Gwinner
Website »

More information

Produced and Organized, Gwinner Studios Ltd. Co. presents an all-Oklahoma, all-Original Music festival located in Bricktown. This is a free event for the community, featuring Oklahoma-original...

Cost: free

Where:
Bricktown
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Sponsor: Gwinner Studios Ltd. Co.
Telephone: 405-740-9618
Contact Name: Jessica Gwinner
Website »

More information

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View map »


Sponsor: The Dinner Detective
Telephone: 866.496.0535
Website »

More information

The evening Cocktail Cruise offers stunning views of the downtown skyline, the Boathouse District & Finish Line Tower, the Wheeler Ferris wheel and, quite possibly, an amazing...

Cost: Adult: $20 Seniors and Children: $15

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Regatta Park Landing
701 S. Lincoln Blvd
Oklahoma City, OK  73119
View map »


Sponsor: Oklahoma River Cruises
Telephone: 405-702-7755
Contact Name: Che Loessberg
Website »

More information

EVERY BRILLIANT THING strikes a delicate balance between sobering loss and cathartic laughter as it recounts a life lived in the shadow of suicide.  By Duncan Macmillan with Jonny Donahoe,...

Cost: 40.00

Where:
Civic Center Music Hall
201 N Walker Ave
Oklahoma City, OK  73102
View map »


Sponsor: Oklahoma City Rep
Telephone: 405-594-8300
Website »

More information

Show More...
Show Less...
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